It’s Friday…
Ahem…I mean Frightday…
And I have some recommendations for you to enjoy this weekend…
Okay…This Frightday’s theme is…
Viruses, Pandemics, and Quarantines…Oh My!
So here we are…
In the midst of a global pandemic…
And as I prepare for the possibility…
Of being locked in with my family…
I find myself oddly drawn to the films…
That bear a striking resemblance…
To the current situation that we are all facing…
And for me…
The first time that I witnessed anything bearing such a resemblance…
Was in the 1971 adaptation of Michael Crichton’s novel of the same name…
The Andromeda Strain…
An intense and, analytically-driven medical thriller…
Where a team of scientists are confronted with the threat of a deadly pathogen…
And just like the films that I am recommending to you…
It shows us that not only can things always be worse…
But they also…
Always get better…
When we listen to those smart fuckers out there…
Who know more about this shit than we do…
I hope these recommendations help a little bit, my horror-loving friends…
Take care…
Stay safe…
And…
Be well.
So, let’s take a chronological look at the best, most frightening, and possibly even unknown to you, Movies About Viruses, Pandemics, and Quarantines…In the years following The Andromeda Strain.
12 Monkeys (1995) – In this twisted little nugget from the cartooned brain of Terry Gilliam…Bruce Willis plays James Cole, a prisoner forced to travel back in time in search for a sample of a virus that decimated our planet…In hopes that the scientists of the future can find a cure…While dealing with the hiccups of imperfect time jumps…Each and every person Cole meets, thinks he is bat-shit crazy…And when he is finally institutionalized…He meets Jeffrey Goines, an early and iconic role that showcased the talents of Brad Pitt…Goines is the apparent leader of The Army of the Twelve Monkeys, a group believed to be the source of the epidemic…This film is as nutty as a fuckin’ Snickers bar…It has all of the elements that, if you love Gilliam, will make you love this one too…It has a lot of moments that stick in yer craw…Especially with what’s going down right now.
Cabin Fever (2002) – Eli Roth brought us this gnarly, gory, gross-out movie about a flesh-eating virus that attacks a gaggle of unsuspecting teenagers faster than a lumbering psycho in a mask…In this film we see the power of isolation and honesty when these viral outbreaks occur…Every person that roams around with an infection…Even if it is a regular, old, everyday flu…Is potentially risking the lives of their friends, families, and even innocent strangers…And in this film we see some of these whippersnappers not only having to be forced into isolation…But also…Hiding their symptoms, even after they are fully aware of the repercussions of their subterfuge…It is a frightening look at the way humans tend to act in these situations…And a parable that could provide a lesson to those among us…Stupid enough to act like these moronic teenagers did.
I Am Legend (2007) – When I was a kid…I was obsessed with The Twilight Zone…This obsession infected me with a virus that made me equally obsessed with the stories of the show’s creators…Cats like Rod Serling…Charles Beaumont…And most of all…The creator of this particular story…Richard Matheson…Here was a writer who captured the essence of what really drives a story about a global pandemic…It’s all about finding a cure, baby…And in this, the third adaptation of Matheson’s novel of the same name…A virus has wiped 90% of us off the planet…And the majority of the rest of us…Are vampiric creatures with an overwhelming desire to destroy the rest of us that just so happened to be immune…One of the immune folks out there is an army virologist named Lt. Col. Robert Neville…Neville is played by the guy who used to be cast as much as The Rock is now…Will Smith…And he is the only one left that is kicking vampire ass and trying to save what’s left of humanity…And hey…As long as you squint a little bit at the CGI creature effects…You will dig this one.
Quarantine (2008) – This film is a remake of the 2007 found footage zombie movie, REC…In this remake, Jennifer Carpenter (Dexter, The Exorcism of Emily Rose), plays Angela Vidal, a reporter who takes her cameraman on a night with the Los Angeles Fire Department…They are sent to a building where they discover the residents within are being viciously attacked by their neighbors…As they attempt to flee…They discover that the CDC has locked them in, and forced a quarantine of the entire building…This action…Although necessary to prevent the spread of this deadly outbreak…Is sure going to provide those trapped within…One truly fucked-up night…And we are lucky enough…Or unlucky depending on how many times you shart your shorts…To be able to watch.
Carriers (2009) – Okay…In this one…We are introduced to a world in the throws of a deadly pandemic…Two brothers…Danny, played by Lou Taylor Pucci (Spring)…And Brian, played by Chris Pine…Are planning on isolating themselves in a secluded motel in Turtle Beach…And waiting it out…Despite the intelligence of this plan…As you may have guessed…Things don’t work out quite the way these brothers planned…This is an intense, gritty, and realistically terrifying look at the dark and harrowing journey one must endure in a pandemic of this nature…The performances were genuine, and organic…And of all the films on this list…As I sit here…Nearly locked in my apartment…Waiting for this whole thing to blow over…This one…Hits pretty close to home.
The Crazies (2010) – The Purity Police will be calling for my head on a pike for recommending the 2010 remake of George A. Romero’s 1973 classic…Instead of the original…But I gotta tell you…I re-watched this one recently…And you know what…It really holds up…And stands on its own…As a kick-ass viral outbreak horror film…Now with this one…We can have a little fun…Take ourselves out of our current reality, and visit a world where the virus that is spreading through a teeny town in rural Iowa…And this particular virus…Is a whole fuck-load scarier than the one we face now…Sure, my neighbor could disobey the recommendation to stay six feet way from me, and piss me off…Sure, my son might come home from his job at the grocery store, and neglect to wash his hands…But at least they’re not slobbering, monosyllabic, violent psychopaths…Well at least…Not yet.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011) – Although admittedly not even close to being a horror movie…The idea of a virus that not only wipes out a shit-ton of humans…But also passes the evolutionary baton into the stinking paws of damn dirty apes…Is a pretty fucking horrific concept…And folks…I loved this film…Hell…I loved all of the films in this trilogy…But this is the one that deals more with the viral outbreak side of things…And less about the shift in who’s rocking the top of the food chain…And the whole end of the human race shit-storm is born from the search for a cure for Alzheimer’s Disease…That search, and the resulting experimental drug, is the cause of both of these terrifying outcomes…And once again…As this film draws to a close…We bear witness to some of those things that really make a viral outbreak so gawdamn scary.
Hidden (2015) – This film was written and directed by The Duffer Brothers…In case you have been self-quarantined for the last few years…They are the creators of the Netflix series, Stranger Things…This film stars Alexander Skarsgård (True Blood) and Andrea Riseborough (Black Mirror) as parents who have isolated themselves and their precocious daughter Zoe into an underground bomb shelter following a cataclysmic event…The event…Which is pieced together slowly…In a patchwork quilt of flashbacks…Reveals to the audience…That a virus has infected the human race…And it just might be…That this family hidden under the ground…Are the only living survivors…I dug this one…A lot…And…There was a tasty little twist at the end…That I didn’t see coming….So…If you’re looking for something suspenseful and original…Something claustrophobic and thought-provoking…Something well-crafted and genre-bending…Or even just something from the brains behind Stranger Things…Then this is the flick for you.
10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) – This film began as a spec script from Josh Campbell and Matthew Stuecken…Once J.J. Abrams‘ Bad Robot Productions got a hold of it…The decided to make it a pseudo sequel to the successful found footage horror film, Cloverfield released in 2008…This film is a very contained, claustrophobic, character-driven film about being forced into a quarantine…Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Final Destination 3) plays Michelle, who after a car accident wakes up in the fallout shelter of Howard, played by John Goodman…Also locked in…Is Emmett, played by John Gallagher Jr. (Hush), who also happens to be the man who helped Howard build it…These three unlikely roommates are told by Howard that not only is the air above unbreathable…But he has also saved their lives by quarantining them into his shelter with him…His altruism and apparent motives come into question as the story moves along at a breakneck pace…And Winstead…Oh man…Her performance as Michelle…In my opinion…Made her one of the best heroines to ever kick ass in a horror flick.
The Video Store Clerk 